Very cold and windy last night. Instead of lighting a morning fire, I shovel the circle to warm myself, then drive to church. A conversation with Larry after Mass leads me to some introspective thoughts: the ironic contradictions between my zealous idealism and dismal failures.
My earnest desire has long been to accomplish something significant with my life, especially as to eternal realities, or to leave behind a great legacy. This has always seemed a noble aspiration. But then I consider: the ranks of the 'great achievers' include Bill Clinton, Margaret Sanger, Joseph Stalin, Adolf Hitler...
There is no doubt - my current life is a very small and insignificant one. I spend my days shovelling snow, driving nails, cooking pumpkins, and doing what I must do to survive. This may be God making sure my lofty ambitions don't devour my soul. I ask Jesus: Is my ambition and idealism pleasing to You? The answer (I think): Be willing to be small. Be willing to be great, if that's what He wills.
Right now, Jerry is definitely small.
No comments:
Post a Comment